Sunday, January 10, 2010

Reflections in Ice

My holiday has come to a close, and I sit watching as the day grows ever closer. It bothers me how few of my goals I have accomplished over the break. But, the fact that I have all of these goals bothers me as well. I set up so many expectations for my free time, and when it doesn't all fit, I feel as if I've failed. But, if I didn't make the plans, I'd feel unproductive.

The weather hasn't been so cold here in a very long time. There are icicles. Icicles. My hands are cracked and dry from the cold, and I'm trying my hardest to get them back to normal.

I'm not ready to go back to school. The next months are going to be very difficult, because I am preparing two requiems, and an opera. Then, I have midterms. That's the short version, anyway. There are actually lots of other things to fill what few gaps are left in my schedule. However, I did discover today that my class schedule will be lighter than it's ever been, simply because I'm done with my piano courses. I'm starting to believe that it really does get easier as it goes on. I hope so. Last year was much harder than this year in some ways, but in other ways, it was a cake walk.

I am sometimes amazed by how much I've grown up, and how much my family has grown with me. I never thought it would be quite like this, and I'm very happy.

This holiday, the weather, and the wheels of life turning. Things are growing under the ice.

1 comment:

  1. You and I are so much alike it is ridiculous. I am the exact same way of setting up way too many expectations for myself and then feeling like I failed when I don't meet them. Even if I accomplished tons. And then the messed up sleep schedules we both have cracks me up! I thought I was the only crazy one who doesn't sleep. Ever.

    I wish you the best of luck this term in your schooling and I know you will rock it!


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